~Hey family! To immediately clear up any confusion, no, this is not the end of Beautiful. Passionate. Love. In fact, this is only the beginning! I pray this week brought you closure on obstacles out of your control. As for me… Well, keep reading and find out! Heads up, there will be no journey Saturday October 5th. Let’s explore. Indulge & Enjoy!~
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For the pain you’ve caused me, I thank you. For the confusion you’ve poured into me, I appreciate you. For the embarrassment you’ve lathered me in, I honor you! For the insecurities you’ve allowed to blossom within me, I love you.
You’ve been so meticulous in every season of my life! How could I not be in love with you? When the world was against me, you were also. When I thought I had no one on my side, you reassured me. When I just couldn’t seem to get this thing called life right, you found more chaos to throw my way. Thank you!
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See, you have molded me into the beautiful, charismatic, triumphant, woman, I am today! All of these obstacles can be seen as negative, I mean, not even a year ago, I would have called them negative myself.) But, the truth is, the pain and trauma you’ve caused me has been the best thing to have happened to me. You gave me a voice, the very voice the enemy tried to silence.
Remember, when I moved to Georgia? Right, the worst 6 months of my life. I thought, by walking away from you, all of my fears, insecurities, and doubts would disappear. I thought life would be perfect. I was completely wrong. So I came back home. I set a one year plan and surpassed it by 3 years. For some strange reason, I didn’t care about not sticking to schedule.
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When I moved to Georgia, I was running. Running from my mistakes. Running from my past. Running from my pain. Running from a future I didn’t want to accept. I was not only broken but shattered. And, like so many others, I thought packing up and starting over would change my outlook on life. It didn’t.
This time is different though. As I plan a future, in a new state, surrounded by family and endless opportunities, I feel free. I don’t feel my past on my heals just waiting for an opportunity to pull me back in its darkness. I have made peace with my past! I have accepted my faults! And, I have gained closure!
Rochester… as I drive away from you today, I don’t want to say goodbye. Goodbye is too permanent for a place holding almost all of my memories. Goodbye makes it seem like I will never see you again. Goodbye sounds like I’m still running. So no, I won’t say goodbye. What I will say is, “See Ya Later…”
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Yes, family! You read that right! I am relocating and possibly driving as you are reading this! It’s been in the works for 9 months now and I am excited yet nervous to explore my new home!
This week, I want to remind you, your geographic location has no control over your mindset. If you are not happy with yourself in Washington, you won’t be happy with yourself in New York. Change your outlook on life before you try to pick up and start new. The last thing you want to do is bring your misery alone with you.
Today, I challenge you. Find one thing you dislike about the way you’re living. Write it down! Now, think about how changing that one flaw will impact your future. Do you really want to change it? Cool! Write down three ways you can begin to remove this flaw. Don’t want to change it? Fine!! But stop allowing it to dictate your feelings on life!
Remember, there will be no journey Saturday October 5th!
As always, feel free to ask questions and/or leave feedback in the comments section.
(All new journeys will be uploaded Saturdays by 12:30 EST)
I am BEAUTIFUL. I am PASSIONATE. I will LOVE.