~Hey There! I pray this week has revealed just a piece of your destiny to you. Not much, just enough to encourage you to keep pushing through all obstacles in front of you. As for me, this week has been beautiful overall! I reconnected with an old friend and I’m back in the gym! Let’s not waste any time. Clear your mind, get ready for this journey and… Indulge & Enjoy!~
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So, I’ve been struggling with how I wanted to explore this topic, still slightly am… We’re all about transparency here though, so I’m just going to do what I do best and keep it real with y’all! I mean, I know you guys won’t judge me.
If you’ve been exploring with me since the beginning, then you know I’ve struggled with multiple insecurities. From feeling invisible, to looking in the mirror and literally hating the person looking back at me, self-hate confound me.
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A few months prior to the birth of Beautiful. Passionate. Love., I decided I was tired of hating myself and started my journey of self-discovery. While a huge part of this journey is sharing with you all, there is a plethora of hard work and dedication you don’t see.
Humbly, I am oh so very proud to say I’m not that insecure little girl I use to be! Yes, I’ve come a long way, however, some days I feel I’m right back to square one. Now, before someone tries to say, “If you can go back there, then you haven’t grown much at all,” check this out…
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I can’t remember if I told y’all or not, however, shorty is becoming a makeup expert! I began experimenting with it back in April, when one of my friends convinced me to buy my first liquid lipstick (I ended up leaving the store with 5- plus my first makeup bag!)
About a week after my first purchase, I needed a new makeup bag, the original one could no longer zip up. Of course, my work bestie Barbarella and I headed back to Target for a new bag… and more lippies (liquid lipsticks). I was killing the lips and mascara look on a daily. Then, I was introduced to Ulta!!! Words can’t express how much I love this store!
I purchased two eye-shadow palettes and a highlighter palette. COMPLETELY FELL IN LOVE! So, Saturday I make one of my random trips to Ulta (these trips happen about 3 times a week) and decide I want to try foundation. Now, allow me to be honest. I am blessed with very clear, even-toned, beautiful skin, so foundation really isn’t needed. I just wanted to see how it looked! To say, I LOVE IT would be an understatement!! Check it out…
Family!!! Clearly, you all can see, I’m feeling myself! Now, listen to the mess that happens next…
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From the day I started wearing Lippies, criticism regarding me wearing makeup surfaced from everywhere. “That color is too bright,” or “Dark colors don’t fit your complexion…” One person even went as far as saying, “You don’t look right with makeup on.”
Even though I receive so much positive feedback, I was starting to feel discouraged. I love how I look with and without makeup. Am I supposed to stop wearing it simply because the people around me don’t like my new look? Do I have to listen to them? Are they right? Am I using makeup to hide insecurities I thought were gone?
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What I’m realizing is, insecurities don’t ever fully go away. What happens is, as you learn to love yourself and build up your self-esteem, you build security within yourself. So, what starts to happen is, when those insecurities start trying to shine through, a loud voice begins to overpower those thoughts.
Affirmations such as, “I am beautiful even when I don’t feel as such,” no longer have to be verbally said because we don’t have “ugly days” anymore. We begin to see our own beauty in every facial expression we make. We here those negative comments and they begin to go in one ear and out of the other.
The biggest lesson I’ve learned is, there’s always going to be someone who doesn’t like what you choose to do, wear, or say. Their opinions, especially unsolicited, shouldn’t ever contribute to how you feel about yourself. Once you learn to love all of you, finding joy in life becomes so much easier.
As always, feel free to ask questions and/or leave feedback in the comments section.
(All new post will be uploaded Saturdays by 12:30 EST)
I am BEAUTIFUL. I am PASSIONATE. I will LOVE.
