March Madness

Hey family! It’s the last Saturday in this crazy month, and can I just say… THANK GOODNESS! So much has transpired for me this month, (some good, some bad, and some not yet categorized), I feel it’s necessary to this self-reflection journey, and fully close the door on a few chapters in life. Are y’all ready to explore with me? Indulge & Enjoy!

My Past…

You seem to creep up on me when I least expect it,

Reminding me, I’m not far from where I started.

You encourage me to give up,

And, revert back to the sins I used to love.

You wrap your arms around me,

As a reminder, I’ll never be free.

Yet, daily I push on…

And on, I will continue to push.

Today, I officially say goodbye to you. No more trying to fix relationships that just won’t work (romantically or platonic). No more holding on to moments, unworthy of my attention.

Today, I change the locks on my heart, to make sure your key no longer works. I accept you, I love you, and I appreciate you. Please don’t “drop by,” or “check-in,” I promise I’ll always be okay… Be blessed.

My Present…

I constantly ignore you,

As I check-in, to see who’s come back around.

I pretend it’s not that serious,

As I slowly drift back to my old ways.

I always repeat this cycle,

Walking away from you to reminisce.

Yet, daily, you push me to push on…

And on, I will continue to push.

I’m here! I’m presently present! I want to pour into you and admire our time together. We both know this isn’t going to be easy, but I’m here. I promise to be committed to you and appreciate what you have to offer.

I know I’m a lot to deal with, and at times I’m all over the place, so thank you for never giving up on me. Please, continue to force me to keep my head up… I love you!

My Future…

Damn, you are always in the back of my mind,

Knowing every choice I make alters a different time.

I wish I could see more of you,

Just to show me what it is I need to do.

To give up my past is such a risk,

What if I don’t enjoy the unknown that doesn’t yet exist?

Yet, daily, we push on…

And on, we will continue to push.

I do not own you, therefore I promise to let you be and to stop trying to control you. I also promise, to enjoy the precious moments that are passing me by. I know it’s not easy for you to sit and watch me make the same mistakes over and over again, so I’ll try to make better choices in life.

You are so bright and beautiful. You have so much potential! Don’t let me or anyone else dim your light! As the days, months, and years pass the one thing I always want you to remember is, I love the strong, vibrant, beautiful, woman you grow into daily. The best is yet to come…

March showed me some really dark days. At times, I felt as though my voice had been taken from me, again. I struggled to see my beauty. I struggled to feel loved. I even struggled to love myself. In the midst of all of my struggling, I knew if I just continued to go through the motions I would feel again.

If this month was a struggle for you, I want you to journey through why. When you have your why(s), I want you to sit down and truly reflect on them. Are they true? Are they changeable? Can you change them? Can you remove them from your life? From here, make the necessary changes to protect your peace. No one on this earth can overcome your struggles but you. I love y’all.

(All new journeys will be uploaded Saturdays by 12:30 EST)

I am BEAUTIFUL. I am PASSIONATE. I will LOVE.

Misconception

Hey Family!! I want to take the time to thank y’all for rocking with me! This is our second spiritual journey, and to be honest, these may be my favorite journey!

So often, as Christians, the notion of getting it right is forced on us. We are made to believe there is no room for error and if we do make a mistake, we’re doomed to hell. (Now, don’t get it twisted, neither my current or previous Church is teaching this…)

This week we are going to journey through the misconceptions of giving your life to Christ. Indulge and Enjoy!

Before we proceed, I have to give credit where credit is due. About 2 years ago, I started removing secular music from my playlists and began listening to more faith-based music. There was an artist, by the name of Lecrae, I had a little bit of knowledge on from a song, he released in 2006, titled Prayin’ for You.

I decided to binge listen to him and I came across a song titled Misconception Pt 2. This song blessed me tremendously! I immediately added it to my daily rotation to encourage me to keep pushing on my journey to Christ. Check it out! Really pay attention to the chorus…

Chorus:

We’re flawless, and we think we’re better,

Its official, got it all together,

We don’t want em getting the wrong impressions,

Cause that ain’t real that’s a misconception,

Been a struggle, only Jesus kept us,

And we still fall, so it’s hard to get up,

We don’t want em getting the wrong impressions,

Cause this is real ain’t no misconception…

Did you listen to it? What are your thoughts? For me, this song helped to remove the stigmas society forced on me as a Believer. I was reminded, even with Christ in my life I’m still flawed. There will never be a day, I wake up sin-free, yet I strive for it daily.

Some of the world expects us to have it all figured out the moment we accept the Lord as our Savior. Well, guess what… it doesn’t work like that! I gave my life to Christ at the age of 9 and recommitted my life to him in October of 2017. I still don’t have it all figured out. I’m trying though. I will never stop trying…

I guess what I’m saying is Believers struggle too. It’s not above us, and it doesn’t mean we’re hypocrites. It means we’re human. Stop trying to force yourself into the box of perfection. You will never fit!

(All new journeys will be uploaded Saturdays by 12:30 EST)

I am BEAUTIFUL. I am PASSIONATE. I will LOVE.