My Heart

Hey Family! I promise I’m trying to get back into the swing of posting, it’s just taking a little longer than expected. I have started writing again though, and we should have a consistent schedule soon! This journey is so special to me, as I have spent my entire adult life trying to process the emotions associated with it. At halfway to thirty, I’m proud to say progression is visible!

I was asked, by a friend, what the subject of this journey was, and honestly, it was tough to categorize. Words such as closure, new beginnings, friendship, love, appreciation, and healing come to mind (all valid and very much needed). This journey has brought me peace, and I pray you take in the words I’ve strung together to express my thoughts, and appreciate where life has you at this very moment. Ready to explore? Indulge and enjoy!

I’m not trynna be funny but, I need my heart back,

I mean, we’ve been at this for years and I agree it’s sad…

We fight,

Break up,

Make up,

Then make lov— lust and call it love…

A couple months here, maybe a year there,

We both know we’re not right for each other,

Yet we keep fighting to keep one another…

But, what kind of life is this?

”We’re on two different life journeys,”

The relief I felt hearing you acknowledge this soothed my soul…

I imagined a sign saying “The end is here…”

Wow.. 16 years… That’s a long time…

16 years of circles…

16 years of being in each other’s back pocket, as a “just in case…”

16 years of foggy uncertainty…

And now, we can finally see…

As we pack up a decade plus of history, I want to thank you…

You met me at my most fractured stage in life and didn’t take advantage of me…

You were forced to deal with my parental issues and countless insecurities…

You kept my secrets and always showed up when I needed you…

So, thank you for being my safe place in my fragile state…

In the midst of countless heartbreaks, we tried to do so much good…

And those are the memories I’ll hold close to my heart…

While transitioning to platonic friendship, there’s just one thing I want to make clear…

You are very much appreciated…

And, thank you, for giving me my heart back.

Be blessed!

If you’ve enjoyed this journey, explore with me through “Long Over Due,” a heartfelt apology, originally explored December 2019.

(New journeys will be uploaded at least once a month.)

I am BEAUTIFUL. I am PASSIONATE. I will LOVE.

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